Well, folks, The Povetkin vs Rahman Comedy Hour is almost upon us as Saturday winds down. The real fight action of course will be provided by the defacto main event when undefeated Kubrat Pulev, 16-0, 8KO rumbles with the former kickboxer, Alexander Ustinov, 27-0, 21 KO, a mountain of 300+ solid pounds spread out uniformly on his 6-8 Russian grizzlybear frame.
The much awaited comedy hour endured delays from alleged injuries sustained by Hasim Rahman when he attempted to drop the blubber of some 300 lbs of inactivity. It was way back in the Pleistocene era when Rahman last beat a Ring ranked fighter though to be fair, since then all his losses were at least against contender types or champs such as Wlad Klitschko. It must also be noted that Rahman was quite literally robbed after landing a 1001 jabs along with a stiff right hand that knocked James Toney clear across the ring in the reverse ring waddle of the year. Unfortunately the routine nature of true robberies gets mixed into the howls of lesser robberies that typically accompany most every fight card in the world, so Rahman never got credit, the last fight he was in any semblance of shape.
Well, folks, the current WBA champ Alexander Povetkin is very much like all the previous WBA champs going back well over a decade now, he desperately needs a 40ish tubby former American champ or contender well past his best in order hold on to his Comedy Crown. It should be noted that Wlad Klitschko easily dismissed the last two WBA champs, Ruslan Chagaev and David Haye, but then Klitschko is so much more than a mere WBA champ that he is excluded from any comparison.
Povetkin was signed to fight Wlad a few years ago, but the fight fell out on a supposed tear of an ankle tendon, an Achilles heel as it turned out for Povetkin. He has since gone from being the touted Olympic Gold Medalist and top contender to a running joke trained by everyone’s favorite Uncle Teddy into a disaster case.
When he faced the best ever fighter of his career, fellow Sauerland stablemate and Cruiser champ Marco Huck, he resembled more the drunken Russian sailor on shore with his head between his knees for defense as his guts convulsed in horror. Poor Huck was reduced to bouncing Povetkin’s noggin off the canvas with rabbit shots, the only punch available to him to crack Povetkin’s illegal defense that he was never warned penalized for.
Teletubbies 256 lbs vs 229 lbs
Never seen a fighter more punch drunk reeling about the ring on spaghetti legs than Povetkin, yet he won the decision, natch. Enter long time Don King fighter Hasim Rahman into this fetid mess with a chance to tie Muhammed Ali’s three heavyweight titles won.
Yup, sometimes truth is stranger than fiction and you laugh at the WBA matchups so hard that you cry.
Well, folks should be well set up in a fine fettle after the colossal battle between the Bulgarian Pulev and the Russian Ustinov who may be of Belarus origin. Both are classic come forward offensive fighters swinging some serious clubs, so short of a draw, someone’s zero is got to go since the stakes are the EBU heavy title and IBF International title.
Three of these four heavyweights are Eastern Europeans of undefeated contender status as befits the current international intrusion on the former American stronghold. Hasim Rahman may no longer be in their class, but he knows that he could well deliver another peach of a right hand to make the history, so laugh at your own risk, or cry, or grin and bear it, the choice is yours.